Lord of the Fries
“May I be able to binge on all the fries I want!”
Charlie flung his coin into the wishing well at the foot of the hill. The trek was his parents’ idea.
“It's family fun!” they had said. “It's rigorous exercise!” had went unsaid.
They trekked together to the hilltop, where the sunset was breathtakingly beautiful.
“Charlie, don’t stand so close to the edge!”
He heard the warning late, as he lost his balance and toppled down.
***
Charlie opened his eyes. He looked around and screamed. He was surrounded by egg-shaped creatures, staring at him curiously!
What fresh hell was this?
“Lord, are you awake?” one of the eggs inquired.
“Eh?”
“You fell from the sky! That makes you our Lord. I am Humpty,” the egg-in-charge announced. Charlie was dumbstruck. Lord was an improvement over his last nickname- ‘Chubby Charlie’.
Charlie followed the eggs meekly. They escorted him to a magnificent castle. Whatever suspicions he had harboured, vanished when he set foot into the exquisite banquet hall. An elaborate spread of crunchy fries, cheesy pizzas, cupcakes, and silky chocolate ganache awaited him.
This must be heaven.
He dug in exclaiming, “fries must be the made the national dish.”
Humpty bowed. “Your wish is our command!”
Charlie was thrilled. He assumed his royal duties and made new rules for his egg-subjects.
“This land shall be renamed FoodVille. There shall be no restrictions on food. You’ll be allowed to eat freely, pray freely, and love freely.”
Consequently, his subjects splurged on delectable delights galore. Greens were largely forgotten, except in garnish. As a result, the eggs began to expand.
Humpty appraised Charlie of all the happenings in the Eggdom.
“Inflation is at an all-time high. My inflation is 200%, and I’ve grown much bigger compared to before.”
Charlie dismissed Humpty’s concerns.
“Happiness matters, not inflation.”
***
One day, Charlie heard the terrible news.
Humpty had a fall. He was perched on a wall when he lost his balance and cracked his sides. His family had rushed him to the hospital.
Charlie met the senior physician, Dr. Eggnatius.
“Eggs don’t topple easily, except when they are obese. Your policies have caused Humpty great harm. To recover, he needs to diet. Else, he could become omelette!”
Charlie’s heart skipped a beat, feeling guilty for his friend’s predicament. He went to Humpty’s bedside. The egg was bandaged-up, looking morose.
“I’m sorry. It’s my fault. Junk food was bad for you.”
“It’s OK. I’m going to work on myself, and I’ll get better. So should you,” said Humpty.
“I will!” Charlie promised.
***
Charlie woke up, to see his family heave a sigh of relief.
“Thank God, you’re OK!”
“What happened?”
“You fainted,” cried Mum.
Ah, Foodville had been an illusion.
“I feel fine.”
“When we reach home, we’ll get you a brownie,” assured Dad.
Charlie grimaced.
“May I have boiled broccoli instead?”
Mum looked at Dad, convinced that the fall had impacted Charlie’s brain.
But then, they didn’t know about Humpty, did they?
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